06 February 2012

The Hamster Conquers All

Mark Trueblood, in a post titled “Men are boorish and lazy.Why won't they marry us?,” offers this observation:

Millions of fabulous, strong, and independent single women have a problem: They can't find a man to marry. Numerous blogs and articles have been popping up all over the place on this troubling issue.
"Where Have The Good Men Gone?" This infamous article by Kay Hymowitz (which I reviewed here) purports to explain why so many modern, perfect, goddess-like females are loathe [sic] to sully themselves with their lowly male counterparts.

Of course, there is a lot of humor in seeing women spend so much time complaining about how terrible men are only to turn around and wonder where all the marriageable men are.  It’s ironic on several levels.

Interestingly, this love-hate relationship is reminiscent of another group of people:  MGTOWs.  MGTOWs tend to complain about how lazy and shallow women are, yet if you were to ask them if they would marry a beautiful, submissive* woman, most of them would say yes.

The problem, then, that most MGTOWs and carousel riders face is that of relative scarcity. Well, that and sour grapes syndrome.  Anyhow, relative scarcity refers to a market condition when a highly demanded item—in this case, a desirable marital partner—is in such low supply that few can afford to attain it.  In the carousel riders’ respective cases, their tendency to slut it up radically diminishes their SMV, in part because most carousel riders are past their prime when they decide to settle down, and in part because men generally prefer, ceteris parabis, that their prospective wife have a low partner count, which highly desirable men can generally get because of their own market value.  In the case of MGTOWs, they are simply too beta, which thus diminishes their market power and hampers their ability to acquire attractive, submissive women.

Ultimately, the problem is that there aren’t enough good alphas or attractive, submissive women to go around.  As such, the sexual marketplace tends to sort itself out quite efficiently, and the losers are, generally, lesser betas/omegas and sluts.  The former become MGTOWs and the latter turn into shrieking harpies that demand men to “man up.”

Interestingly, the response of MGTOWs and sluts are generally similar:  instead of upping their value, they decide to blame the market.  The difference between the two groups is that MGTOWs leave the market while carousel riders simply lower their price (i.e. offer easier sexual access).  Both routes end in misery, and both endings can be avoided by making choices that increase one’s value.  In essence, the sexual market failure is the fault of its participants.  They’ll never admit to it, though, because it’s easier to blame an abstract entity than to actually admit that a good portion of one’s problems are one’s own fault.

* “Submissive,” of course, referring to those qualities that minimizes or eliminates a woman’s tendency to divorce her husband.


  1. The dating market is really painful to watch as someone who's been out of it for 8 years.

    There are good women out there and men who could be good men, but sexual mores and laws work entirely against marriage. Only a religious man or a foolish man would get married today.

    A good chunk of the beautiful, popular women I went to high school with are unmarried into their 30s and are now past their "sell-by" date. A good chunk of the talented men are unmarried as well.

    If you want to get married and have kids, you have to marry early whether you're a man or a woman. Marriage-minded people select each other early.

    We're definitely going through a great unraveling in this country because married young people with stable families are rare.

  2. "Marriage-minded people select each other early."

    I get the feeling that a lot of the people complaining about the poor choices on the marriage market are older in age. Essentially, they decided to play around for a decade, and then by the time they decided to get married, there was no one on the market who wanted them.

  3. And it gets worse:
    Yesterday I was listening to a local pop music station when the newscaster came on; one of her reports was that a female NJ state legislator has proposed a law calling for DV offended to wear ankle bracelets: the spouse (female of course) could go on line and keep track of the "offender's" where abouts.

  4. @njartist- that just sounds like a way for women to surreptitiously stalk alphas.

  5. CG,

    You're wrong about MGTOW, at least this one. When I was younger, I knew I wasn't ready for marriage; I knew I had to 'up my value', which I tried to do by going to school, getting better jobs, etc. Unfortunately, by the time I WAS ready for marriage; by the time I was mature enough; by the time I'd upped my value as best I could; I realized that the available women weren't worth the effort I'd expended-not when all that's available are bitter, angry used up divorcees or women who'd ridden the carousel too long...


  6. @MarkyMark- my observations are generalizations. The language of the assertions should make that clear. You being the exception does not invalidate the assertions.

    My main assertion--that MGTOWs drop out of the market when they realize their value is too low to pull a submissive hottie--is still correct by your own admission.