03 October 2012

The Heart Is Deceitful Above All Things

In the manosphere, one point that is often made is how there is often a difference between what a woman says she wants, and what she responds positively to.  I have no quibbles with this claim, but I do find it interesting how some in the manosphere seem to imply that women are liars for saying they want something but actually responding positively to something else.  Others have asserted that women are simply not self-aware.  I think that there is a third possibility.  Namely, that there is a difference between what a woman wants and what makes her happy.

For example, many women claim they want a nice guy who will take care of them.  However, they only seem to be happy when they are in the tingle-inducing presence of a cad.  Now, some have argued that attraction is presumed when women respond to the question of what they want, and this is indeed a possibility.  But it is also possible, and actually quite likely that women desire a nice guy.
This very dynamic is actually seen in Genesis 3 when God curses Eve.  He tells her that her desire shall be to rule over her husband but that he shall rule over her. In essence, she is going to want one thing but be happy with another thing.  She will want to rule, but she will only be happy when she is ruled over.

But this discrepancy is not limited strictly to women.  Even men have this same problem, and this is simply to the nature of humanity.  Men and women alike have self-destructive impulses, and often desire things that they know, intellectually, will end up making them unhappy, or even destroying them.  Many men might envy the life of a male porn star, but to live such a life is profoundly depressing.  Many women might desire to be married to a man who will cater to their every need, but deep down they know that such a relationship—one where the woman wears the pants—will make them profoundly unhappy.

The fact of the matter is that the heart is deceitful above all things, and often tells us that we want something, even though we know, deep down, that what we want will make us unhappy.  Therefore, we should not concern ourselves with what we want (or, more accurately, what we think we want), but rather we should concern ourselves with those things that will make us happy.


  1. Materialist have no concept of the nature of evil or sin.