This definition ignores women’s generally more responsive sexuality. A lot of women are sexual and want sex, but when forced into a dating drought, they kind of go into “convent mode.” And most churches teach convent mode behavior to women when they keep telling women not to make marriage an idol, to find their true fulfillment in Jesus, to wait on the Lord, and to stop reading romance novels (sexless Christian romance novels are a thing, so it’s not just “Don’t read 50 Shades,” guys) or watching romantic movies or soap operas or whatever will exacerbate their “discontentment” with singleness. Often women in convent mode start spending more of their time with female friends, and this just reinforces the conventing because new guys aren’t entering their social spheres. So you end up with all these women who “want” marriage, but it’s just not happening, but until someone comes along for that, they need to guard their hearts and focus on the Lord and not make marriage or sex an idol. You can see how this is a self-perpetuating cycle. [Emphasis added.]
This reminds me of something I wrote a while ago:
In [I Corinthians 11], Paul says that, “the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.” From this I gather that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. But maybe I’m just simple.
In another passage, Paul would say “And I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence. For Adam was formed first, then Eve.” Going back to the beginning, we find that God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” Then we find that “the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.”
Really, the notion that Woman (or women) answers to God is simply unbiblical. There is a natural order to this world, and a natural hierarchy within it. The Natural Hierarchy, as given by God through the apostle Paul is as follows: God rules over Christ, who rules over Man who rules over Woman.
One of the larger, albeit more subtle failures of nominally Christian teaching over the last several decades has been the doctrine that women need to focus on serving Jesus. This sounds like a wonderful doctrine, and passes the sniff test, but this is unbiblical. Scratch that, this doctrine is anti-biblical since it teaches the exact opposite of what’s actually found in the Bible. The doctrine of women serving Christ directly is implicitly feministic and egalitarian, and neither of these concepts are intrinsically Biblical.
As such, a lot of church leaders spend a lot of time encouraging women to do things for which they are not particularly well-suited, like leadership, and being single. Women were designed by God to by helpers for men, which is why men are given headship over women, and why women desire to be wives and mothers. It’s their role, and anyone who tells women that they are wrong for wanting to be a wife or mother, or that they are committing idolatry by wanting to be a wife and mother, is simply evil and a servant of Satan.
While it might be tempting to say that women should know better, the truth is that most women, like most men, will defer to other authorities on matters like these. Thus, the sad state of marriage and dating in the church can be laid most squarely upon Satanic church leaders and weak parents, for they are the ones who have done the most to handicap this generation.
What I’ve observed is that the notion that women should want to be wives and mothers is so passé and unfashionable that few single women under the age of twenty are even willing to admit they want such a thing, unless its accompanied by the caveat that this is something they will attain once they’re established in their career.
In fact, I can only recall one girl who simply straight-up told me that she simply wanted to be a wife and mother when she got older (we were in high school at the time). I was very impressed by this admission, especially since all the girls I went to church with always made a point of sharing their collegiate and professional aspirations. Anyhow, the point I’m getting at is that of all the girls I’ve ever known over the course of the past eight years, only one had the guts to admit that she really just wanted to be a wife and mother.
And for this sad state of affairs, I blame church leaders. They should be the one holding fast to God’s word, they should be the ones encouraging women and men alike to fulfill their God-given roles, and they should be the ones telling men and women not lose heart in working to fulfill their roles. Instead, leaders have bought into the Satanic lies of equality and feminism, and those who have placed their faith in these men have been led into a miserable web of falsehood.