As if Barack Obama didn't have enough problems to deal with already, his administration now is being asked to weigh in on the grave matter of Justin Bieber's bad behavior.
By midday Wednesday (1700 GMT), a petition on the White House website calling for the deportation of the Canadian-born teen idol had garnered 103,000 names -- easily surpassing the threshold of 100,000 signatures required for presidential consideration.
"We the people of the United States feel that we are being wrongly represented in the world of pop culture," says the petition, created by one "J.A." in Detroit on January 23, the day Bieber was busted in Miami Beach for impaired driving and illegal drag racing in a flashy Italian sports car.
"We would like to see the dangerous, reckless, destructive and drug-abusing Justin Bieber deported and his green card revoked. He is not only threatening the safety of our people but he is also a terrible influence on our nation's youth. We the people would like to remove Justin Bieber from our society."
The White House website hosts citizens' petitions on other, more heady issues such as the legalization of marijuana and a pardon for National Security Agency whistleblower Edward Snowden.
"Every petition that crosses the threshold will be reviewed by the appropriate staff and receive a response," assistant White House spokesman Matt Lehrich said.
Hopefully the response to this petition is that the state department revokes Beiber’s O-1 visa and has him deported back to the land of ice and syrup. I say this not simply because I hate Bieber, but also because I believe that this administration is less likely to fuck up things of major import if it’s too busy worrying about trivial things. Basically, I want the government to do as little as possible, and spending lots of time dealing with a celebrity’s visa status definitely falls under that category. Also, fuck Beiber.